Monday, December 29, 2008

Top Ten List of GOOD SPORTS 2008 compiled by January Jones

Happy New Year's Eve to You and Yours!

Remember, Thou Shalt Not Whine in 2009!

Before you start making your New Year's resolutions, take a moment to reflect on all the wonderful things that have happened this past year.

Granted, we all have had some things take place that are cause for WHINING but try to remember the Good Times not the Whine Times!

It's been quite an amazing year with some really Good Sports on the front pages. All of the people on my 2008 List of Good Sports this year have lived their lives publicly with grace and good humor. They are people we can admire and try to emulate.

Here it is:

The January Jones 2008 Top Ten Good Sports

"If you can't be a whiner or a winner, at least be a good sport." January Jones

#1. Sarah Palin - SNL was the highlight of her campaign thanks to Tina Fey!

#2. Joe Biden - He is who he is with no apologies & he loves dogs!

#3. Hillary Clinton - It's not easy being a loser or being married to Bill.

#4. Paul Newman - Handsome, heroic, helpful and honorable HUSBAND!

#5. Michelle Obama - She makes marriage and motherhood matter.

#6. John McCain - Gracious concession speech plus great talk show guest.

#7. Jennifer Aniston - Despite insensitivity in others, she's sensitive and smiling.

#8. Clint Eastwood - A Grand man in a Gran Torino who still makes our day.

#9. Kelly Ripa - Regis' sidekick, so sweet, so smart, so savvy and so solvent.

#10. Laura Bush - Lovely lady who stands by her man despite soem stupid statements.

Top Ten Winners List of 2008 by January Jones

Correction: Top Ten #1 Whiner of 2008 is Governor Blagojevich of Illinois
(Not Mayor of Chicago with apologies to Mayor Daley)

January's Top Ten Winners List of 2008

"Who says you can't have it all? "
January Jones

#1. Obama - Historic, handsome and wholesome President-elect.

#2. Oprah - Despite her usual diet drama, she's everyone's best friend.

#3. Michael Phelps - 8 gold medals and he's still an all-American nice guy.

#4. Tina Fey - Bright, beautiful and brilliant bombshell.

#5. Angelina & Brad - Ideal couple, children, career, charities & Benjamin!

#6. Jon Stewart -Clever, comedic and cute class clown that never grew up.

#7. Anderson Cooper - Tall, wealthy, handsome, daredevil and such a nice guy.

#8. Bonnie Hunt - A mother's dream daughter, refreshingly frank and funny.

#9. Regis Philbin - The King of Whining, TV's oldest and wealthiest whiner.

#10. Bernard Madoff - Stole $50 billion and is just surviving "Mansion Arrest."

Tomorrow, I'll list The Top Ten Best Sports of 2008!~

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Top Ten Whiners List from January Jones Preview 2008

Here are "The Top Ten Whiners" of 2008 from a recently conducted survey.

Top Ten Whiners: “So many, so little space!” January Jones

1. Chicago Mayor Blagojevich – This guy is not only delusional, he’s demented.

2. Alaska Senator Stevens – This guy is not only a crook, he is a creep!

3. Fox News- Sean Hannity & PaPa Bear whine even more than Colbert.

4. New York Governor Eliot Spitzer - Horny, hookers and hopelessly stupid.

5. Rosie O’Donnell – Everybody loves to bash Rosie, big target with big heart.

6. Bill Maher – This man is trying to get burned at the stake.

7. Stephen Colbert – Belligerent, bombastic and brilliant.

8. O.J. Simpson – So smart and then stupid, stupider and stupidest man alive!

9. Joy Behar – The only original View survivor! Watch out Elisabeth!

10. Jack Nicholson – “Can’t pick up on girls in public like I used to.”

All comments or new nominations are welcome.

Remember, Thou Shalt Not Whine in 2009!

Happy New Year
January Jones

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Top Ten Whines from January Jones preview 2008 List

No whining here!

Welcome to this preview of my 2008 Top Ten List of Whines, Whiners, Winners and Good Sports! If you disagree or have any suggestions just email me at I'd love to hear from you.

Tomorrow I'll preview The Top Ten Whiners of 2008!
January Jones: 2008 Top 10 Whines, Winners, Whiners & Good Sports

Top Ten Whines: ”Do we have enough time?”

1. Economy – No one has enough except CEOs, celebrities and crooks.

2. Bail Out – No one is happy and who is going to bail out the bail out?

3. Automakers – So sad, they had to leave their private jets at home!

4. War – Enough is enough, with too, too much money and military!

5. Healthcare - Why is it easier to die than to get treatment?

6. Weather – Do you think global warming might be for real?

7. Elections – Been there, done that, too long, too boring and too stupid.

8. Gas prices – Do you think that we are pawns of some Texas/Saudi OIL men?

9. Air Travel – Too scary, too crowded, too expensive and too much time!

10. Politicians – Are they all crooks or does it just seem that way?

Happy Holidays & Remember, Thou Shalt Not Whine in 2009!

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

January Jones e-zine Dec. 24th The Night Before Christmas ....No Whining - Only Dining & Shining

December 24, 2008

Channel Description

Welcome to Whine Time:
Happy Holidays to you and yours!
Click below for January's YouTube welcome and introduction to her holiday interviews.
It's the most wonderful time of the year and now that all the hustle and bustle are over it is time to
Whine Down!

I have chosen the most inspiring interview that I did this year as a little Holiday gift for you to enjoy.

My guest is Anne Ginther who is with Random Kids and shares with us a truly inspiring story about kids who will amuse, amaze and astound you.

Anne Ginther is the President and a founder of RandomKid. She recruited and placed executives with fortune 100 companies for over 15 years until the hurricane of Biblical proportions in 2005 (Katrina) made a Biblical impact on her life! She shut down her successful recruitment firm to start and run RandomKid for free.
RandomKid is a 501(C)(3) nonprofit organization that believes that any random kid has the power to solve real world problems, and they're helping kids do just that. RandomKid brings kids of all abilities and all walks of life together to make an impact on the problems our world faces. In just two years, children have unified their little cottage industry efforts to ultimately raise over $10 Million for Hurricane Relief.

Recently RandomKid worked with three elementary classrooms to educate and empower children to create their own bottled water businesses--selling enough water in just 6 months to fund a pump in South Africa that for the first time provides clean safe water to a school of 700 children, and up to 2500 people in the surrounding community. They worked with kids from 20 different countries to fund a school that the kids will get to name on opening day this July.
And they've also helped kids help children and families right in their own communities. USA Today calls Anne "The Pied Piper" guiding child-led initiatives. Anne is just back from showcasing RandomKid at a global event about raising compassionate children featuring The Dalai Lama.

Now sit back and relax with a cup of tea or hot chocolate & click the link below to listen to our show:
Then I have a really, really fun interview that I did on Christmas eve morning with Mary Jane Popp on her PoppOff syndicated radio show from KIAM 950:

Just click the link below and enjoy the show:
I have included an excerpt from my book to honor all of our dear ones who are gone but never forgotten.
Now sit back and enjoy reading about :

The Pity Party Cure

A lot of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.
Oprah Winfrey

My Mother had a cure for whining that she used on me, and it’s one that I have successfully used on my own kids. It’s similar to the Norwegian Ris-pa-rumpin Cure but not nearly as charming. Basically, it’s another question approach with consequences. The question is always asked in a mother’s “I mean business” tone of voice, and it goes like this: “If you want to whine, do you want me to give you something to really whine about right now?” It worked then and it works now.

Then I didn’t know anything about what really whining meant. Nor did I know anything about consequences. Now I do. When my first husband, David, a Navy test pilot, was tragically killed in a crash, I quickly found out what it really meant to really have something to whine about.

Somehow I survived, but only because of my best friend, Jane. We had become fast friends when fate found us buying new homes next door to each other back in 1968. We were pioneers in a newly suburbanized area north of Los Angeles called Westlake Village, The City in The Country.

Jane and I had a lot in common. I knew immediately that we were a perfect match the day our new carpets were installed. Jane’s floor covering was lime green while I had chosen bright orange. Remember, it was the dawning of the Age of Aquarius. We were determined that our homes would be psychedelically correct. We weren’t just California dreaming, we were California living.

Despite the ray of sunlight Jane’s friendship provided, David was dead and, frankly, I wished I were, too. My babies missed their daddy. We all did. My first year of widowhood was tough, but Jane ushered me through it by being my one and only guest at a yearlong pity party. Jane knew a lot about whining since she had survived an incredibly tragic childhood. She stepped up to the table with innovative, cutting edge whining techniques that she generously shared with me.

For instance, Jane knew all about looking vulnerable and helpless. She had the biggest, saddest eyes in the world. Together we had the best pity party imaginable. It consisted of a few martinis and lots of commiserating, followed by lots of laughing, and it went on evening after evening. We functioned well during the day knowing happy hour was coming.

Then one day, I was finally all talked and cried out. Jane made me go out to mark the occasion. It was Christmas time. She forced me to go to a party. I resisted but she insisted. Friends don’t let friends whine forever. At that party, I met my second husband. Jane was my matron of honor at our wedding and again at our twenty-fifth anniversary. At that point, we put our pity parties on hiatus for many years while various personal developments took us away from each other. They started up again when Jane got divorced, and then found out she had Stage-3 colon cancer. Now our roles were reversed. She talked while I listened. It was her turn to be angry. It was my turn to listen with unconditional love.

Our final pity party lasted for three years, during which she fought the cancer. We had some of our best times during these years. When I would spend the nights with her at the hospital, we would try not to cry, but laugh instead. It felt so good just to be together at our own private slumber party that laughing came naturally, in fluid waves. It helped us both to relive and recount all of our old, fun times. Our sweet silliness helped to make the long nights shorter.

I was devastated when I lost my best friend. It really hit me hard on the first March 12th after she was gone. My husband, David had died on that day. It was the first time in thirty-two years that Jane hadn’t called me to see how I was doing on that anniversary. She was the only one who always remembered. It had always been a tough day for me, but now it was even tougher without Jane. I still miss her so much that I haven’t removed her from my cell phone speed dial list, just in case.

Aside from helping us get through major tragedies, whining can also accomplish many other wonderful things. Whining works because it gets you attention. It can get what you want or may need. Also, whining is an avenue for communicating that lets you bond with family or friends. As Jane and I proved, it can be very therapeutic. It is important to reach out to others. It can’t hurt but it could help.

After the whining dies down, you will find solutions that will replace the sorrow. Companions can become conduits of compassion. They will help you to make a new plan, an aggressive attack on whatever ails you. It just takes a steady pace of one step at a time, with no looking back. Your best friends will help you face the truth when you can’t do it yourself, and listen to your stories no matter how sad they get—while at the same time making you laugh. With your best friend along for the ride, anything is possible. Just ask Lucy and Ethel or Jane and January.

A good friend is a connection to life,
a tie to the past, a road to the future,
the key to sanity in a totally insane world.
Lois Wyse

Thou Shalt Not Whine...The Eleventh Commandment
by January Jones
Beaufort Books: 2008

The Whine Tester BLOG:
Happy Holidays from The Whine Tester and family and now meet the newest member of our family.

Coming Soon:
Ms. January Jones 2008 Annual List:
Top Ten Whines, Whiners, Winners & Good Sports!
Be sure to send any suggestions you may have for this prestigious list to asap!

Remember, Stop Whining and Start Smiling
and if that doesn't work then Start Eating Chocolate!!!
Thou Shalt Not Whine in 2009!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Guess who's getting a PUPPY? No whining here!

Only One Day to go and we'll be celebrating with The Jingle Bell Twins and our new puppy who doesn't have a name yet!

Our puppy won't be arriving until Christmas morning but I couldn't keep from showing off our adorable new addition to the family. The outfit is over the top but why not? It's our time to enjoy the Holly Jolly Season and continue our year long Silly Sausage campaign.

Happy Holidays to you and yours and may you enjoy health and happiness in the year ahead.
Cheers and Chocolates from The Whine Tester!

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Whine Time Book Publicists of So. California

HAPPY HOLIDAYS FROM Book Publicists of Southern California!!!

A fun time was had by all at Irwin Zucker's annual Christmas Party at the Sportsman Lodge in Studio City. As always it was standing room only with a wonderful and inspirational program.

I was so pleased to be with my dear friends Patti Kokinos, the author of Angel Park, Lorrie Hull, the television host of "Alive After Sixty-Five" in Santa Barbara and dear, dear Ron Oberon, the author of Our Earth and Beyond!.

It's hard to believe but we are in the final countdown and Santa is busy making his list and we're all being such good kids. We hosted my dear friends from Las Amigas last night and they so generously donated in the Christmas spirit a big check to our local Manna group!

I've been busy doing interviews on holiday whining. On Christmas Eve morning at 10:00 am PS, I'll be talking to my dear friend Mary Jane Popp from station KAHI Sacremento, CA. As a warm-up, I will be on the air with KWNA radio at 8:10 am PST too.

Also I will be visiting with my Canadian friends, on The Late Night Counsell CFRA_CTV 580 AM on December 22nd at 7:00pm PST. Hopefully, I will be able to help everyone get a handle on the whining so that Santa will be able to visit everyone this year.

Remember, Thou Shalt Not Whine in 2009! Love to all, January

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Holiday Whining and Ten Tips for Turbulent Times

It's that wonderful time of the year when Holiday Whining can happen to anyone. So here are a few tips from my wonderful friends at AATH (Association of Applied Therapeutic Humor) to help us all get through this Holly Jolly Season.

10 Tips For Staying "Up" in Down Times

As a member of the Association of Applied and Therapeutic Humor, I have the opportunity to know some of the most wonderful people in the world and none of them are whiners, well at least not in public. Our members know the value of keeping the right perspective when times are tough and have generated this list of 10 tips to help you lighten up and rise above the current economic turmoil and stress of the holiday season:

1. Adjust Your Attitude - Stop watching the news and start counting your blessings instead of your money! The blessings will increase, while the money is...well, you know! Personally, I try to watch Comedy Central instead of the depressing daily news channels.

2. Make Someone Else Happy - Send unexpected 'thank you' or greeting cards to a mix of people. Start with those who aren't expecting it but deserve it. Then, send a couple to people who aren't expecting and don't deserve it. Then, pick a couple names at random out of the phone book that certainly aren't expecting it and have no idea who you are! How about making sure that you say thank you to your mail carrier and give a gift too. Did you know that $20. is the legal limit that they can accept.

3. Signs of the Times - Have some mirthful signs or sayings handy. For example:
- The rules have changed... there are none!
- Walking on water is in my job description!
- Apparently, not all clowns are in the circus!
- Never wrestle with a pig - you both get dirty, but the pig likes it!
- You don't have to be crazy to work here...but it sure helps!
- If we're closed, just slide the money under the door!
- I'm not weird... I'm gifted!
-Don't let your Jingle Bell become Jingle Hell!

4. Try Some Random Acts of Silliness and Kindness - Wear mismatched gloves or socks... on purpose! Page yourself over the intercom! If and when a store clerk, restaurant server or flight attendant asks matter-of-factly "How are you today?" try replies such as, "Well medicated - and you?" or "At least I'm vertical!" Instead of them always thanking you, thank them first and watch their reaction! I've been wearing my foam clown nose around town telling everyone that I'm Rudolph's grandmother.

5. Fun with Food - Put a bag of cookies or marshmallows in your briefcase. Then, start your meeting by asking, "Dessert, anyone?" Have a marshmallow stacking competition! Put a pack of bubble gum in your coat pocket and, in the elevator, offer some to everyone! I love to pass pout candy canes to strangers and especially children.

6. Pop Goes Your Worries - Save your bubble wrap! It's a great stress reliever. Pop it with your fingers, knees and toes! Dance on it! Pop it with the help of young children! Pop it, in unison, to the beat of music! Popping is better than mopping!

7. Use Your Imagination - Think of what would happen if certain companies merged. For example: Fairchild Semiconductor and Honeywell Corporation would become Fairwell Honeychild. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants would become Poupon Pants. If FedEx joined UPS, they might become FedUP. I'm not clever enough for this one.

8. Rename to Keep Sane - Cash Flow: The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet. Broker: What I am today, after taking the advice of my financial planner. P/E Ratio: The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing. Nor this one.

9. Exaggerate - Comedians overstate things to get a laugh. You can too! Our family is so poor these days... we took out a second mortgage on our cardboard box. Our family is so poor these days... to save on milk, we eat our corn flakes with a fork. Our family is so poor these days... when someone rings the doorbell, I stick my head out the window and yell, "Ding-Dong." I'm going to be playing golf in The World Series of Golf to be televised on CBS Sports prior to the Us Open and unfortuantley this is not an exaggeration.

10. Let a Smile Be Your Umbrella - This simple choice is yours. You can frown and be miserable (way too many people readily choose this option), or you can wear a contagious smile. In your conversations with people, smile and ask to see their smile. Then say, "I see you've been practicing!" Along with the smile be sure to make eye contact and if that doesn't work just give them a just because HUG.

I hope you found some ideas you can use and be sure to let me know how they worked for you!